Am I in the wrong place?

 

Am I in the wrong place?

That is one the most profound questions you will ever ask yourself.

Is this where I’m supposed to be?

Right now?

Are these the people I’m supposed to influence?

Or ignore?

Is so-and-so’s concern a sign that I should?

Or a sign that I shouldn’t be here?

We’ve all been there, are still there, just left or maybe even entering this place.

I’m here to tell YOU, it’s not bad to be there. It’s the perfect question to ask yourself.

GYC Girl…, why?

The reason being, if we don’t wonder WHY, we’re there, we’ll never go deeper than what we already think.

 

I ask God all the time,

“Am I doing what you called me to do right now,

in this very moment…

or is this just Lauren being Lauren?”

 I’ll tell you this much…I’ve been privy to some of the dumbest conversations and most times I can easily drown it out…

 

BUT THEN, there are times where some stuff just doesn’t make sense and the person keeps saying the DUMB thing as if they want ME to confirm that it is DUMB (factually).

Short GYC Story…

 I had a co-worker at a foreign company where everyone that entered around the same time has the same paycheck. Long story short, this co-worker came to this job with a girlfriend, they lived in an apartment that was (unnecessarily) expensive, they broke up, he got a new girlfriend that seemed to live there occasionally but not pay rent to prove his status to her or something, IDK the reason on his heart. Anyway, this co-worker was bragging to me about the height of his bills and wanted to know why I lived where I lived.

I let him have this conversation with himself, twice. I know how much we earn, and now, I know what’s left after he gets done stunting…not much!

I asked God why does this boy keep telling me this dumbness?

 SO I decided if he tells me for the third time, I’ll take it as a sign from God to tell him he’s being dumb/foolish/not smart/unrealistic/ridiculous/a dullard, I mean he can’t afford it.

Well, what do you know?

The third time came around and I simply told him we don’t make that much, and your rent is too high for a place that looks like that.

Then, I did something that I unlearned…

 I told him my business.

 I explained that I live in my particular apartment (with a landlord that I’ve now forgiven with the love of the Lord 😉---if YOU ever see my review on Google, I lit him up!) because I’m never there. This is the amount of my monthly bills, I bring a lunch and don’t eat out so I can have a GOOD time when I travel, which was frequent.

The result, he agreed that his bills were too high, probably told his girlfriend what I said but she officially moved in and helps pay the bills. He let me know this! 😉

You’re welcome.

While I admit that I am not the most financially responsible person… I know when I am doing the MUCH (on purpose)!!!

 

Some THINGS simply don’t add up, physically or mentally!!!

 The difference is some people you’ll meet on your journey have yet to discover that for themselves or are afraid of how they may look if they have to reorganize their life. YOU may be the answer to their prayer by telling them to STOP DOING THAT!!! Trust that YOU will KNOW when it is YOUR VOICE and THOUGHTS that they need to hear.

While I HATED working at this particular location…

Yes, there will be a video about WHY on my YouTube channel…don’t be crazy and SUBSCRIBE Girl!!

The reality is I needed to be there, I needed to be used, I needed to deepen my compassion for people like him, GOD sent me there because HE knew that I could handle it…ALL OF IT!

 

I just gave everybody I worked with a say “it (the silly/ridiculous stuff)" 3 times and I will tell you it’s dumb rule. No one ever verbalized the dislike for my opinion and knew where we were on the scale because they could feel MY thoughts coming!!

 

Alright I hear ya BUT I want the focus on ME!!

Listen, that’s another topic for another day but I will say this…

I lived in Japan, specifically Nagoya…and I wondered this. Nagoya is like Chicago and Tokyo is like NYC, both are great but NOT THE SAME VIBE. I am a black woman that has looked the same for many years all that to say, I know how I look, I’ve heard many of the same compliments, I’m not new in this state so hearing them doesn’t entice me or make me forget who I am. Attempting to attack my identity doesn’t work. I’m well-traveled, solo, so I’ve had to depend on ME and confirm everything with myself and whatever knowledge I choose to trust.

 

I knew I was in the right place (at times) in Nagoya because of the impact my presence had on the people, and the company, even if they didn’t say it to my face,

my value was obvious.

 

When I stopped focusing on myself (meaning instant happiness, do they like me/do I like them, and can I really be successful here, right now!) in a location the answer became obvious. I had to look beyond the surface, understand and discover whether I was sowing seeds into their lives, into my life, consider if I was growing, becoming stronger, building endurance, compassion or simply building hate. I had to process my experiences in that moment!!

 

There have only been 2 geographical places in this world that felt the most comfortable outside of my literal home and that is NYC and Milan, Italy. However, I’m not currently living in either of those places because there is more for me to explore.

 

I’ll leave YOU with this…

Sometimes things don’t feel like home because they are not supposed to. Sometimes your current location is simply a work station…for working on YOU and helping the people around you.

 

Question where you are, and YOU’ll go much further!

 

“Your co-workers dumb questions and assumptions could deepen your compassion.”-GYCGirl…Being Honest

 

See you around the world somewhere,

Xx GYC Girl YOU Crazy aka Lauren Alicia

When a Stranger Lingers… Part 1: Funky guests make your whole house funky

“When we grow…we need to know, WHO didn’t grow with us. Then distinguish if they are the one’s farting on our forward motion vibe.”-GYCGirl…Keeping the TRUTH Simple

“Attitudes are contagious and sometimes place you in bad associations…when the people you choose to hang with…do the things you no longer do.”-Someone in Recovery of an Attitude Change!

You know that moment in your life when a profound movie/TV quote comes on…and you are in TOTAL agreement…

Like the script was meant to talk YOU specifically about that issue???

I know I am not by myself…

Well, my quote is…

“I didn’t change; I grew-up.”

(I do not know the originator of this quote but I did Google it…and Drake was Not the 1st so…if you know…please enlighten me…thank you!)

Take a moment…

Think on it…whether you had to say it to someone or maybe he/she said it to YOU…

No judgment…WE are all growing here!!!

But,

It seems like every time we enter a new season (in life…not weather…well maybe…), some people around us become dead weight that we need to remove so we can move…forward, and meet the amazing people meant for our right now season:

+People that will help us grow and not find joy in keeping us stuck with them.

+People that understand and Respect that our old ways and habits…are OVER, and if they help keep/maintain/give us a reality check…how much greater of a friend YOU, Me, WE can be for them.

It’s like our senses changed…

What once smelled delightful or was enjoyable is now funky and messes up the vibe of whatever good we are trying to pursue…

Our new tolerance begins to be open to attract what pleases/embraces/encourages our new mindset…and we realize “Funky guest make your whole house funky” and at some point we MUST HAVE been the funky guest too…messing up the vibe and/or holding people back!!

When we grow, at some point we have to let go to keep growing.

---I think this lesson we have to live and cannot only be told.---

Because if we can be honest…and GYC usually is…HELLO!!!

There is always someone there when you grow up whether past or new that presents the setback of stepping back…and it’s our responsibility to locate, recognize and decide to keep moving forward with or without them.

My own found truth/Quick Rant (let my grammar do what it wants…)…before I tell a GYC Personal Story…

I later realized that the people I let go of for a season or possibly for good kept me in habits that pushed me nowhere but around…and wondering are they really my friend???...Because in that transitioning state I began to question…Am I funky or is it my guest because I think I’m growing up and moving forward but every time I get around so-and-so or hickamado (if you have grandparents from the south…ask them!)…I can’t tell the difference between who I am and who I was!!! 

When we change for the better on the inside…it should be reflected in our outer actions.

It’s up to us to provide the possible choices of how people decide to perceive us through our decisions of what we keep around us. At some point, when our character changes…so shall our guests.

GYC Personal Story

I want to give a GYC Personal Story…but I have SO MANY examples of this…and I’m sure YOU do too…but I’ll keep it light and people from wondering if I’m talking about them…for the most part…

“I speak of the past so you may know submitting to the process allows you to be built to last.”-Me

So…

I think I’ll tell 2 possibly quick stories…and see where we land!

Let’s start in the 2nd or maybe it was the 1st grade (whatevs),

There was this girl that I considered my best friend…who happened to be picking on/possibly bullying another girl from my neighborhood of which my then best friend is not from…but from what I do recall…they were going back and forth at each other.

HOWEVER, by the end of these events, the next day I walked home taking my usual route…and I was aggressively greeted by the brother and sister of the girl my then best friend had exchanged words with…

That’s right, I was pushed up against a fence and questioned about the words/actions that took place and did not involve me at all…I WAS ALMOST JUMPED for association in the 2nd grade! Until I threw that then best friend all the way under the bus!!! Please excuse me but I have never been one to play those games…I need my life (undamaged)!

If you don’t get down with what is going down…you need to find some new friends to be around.

Long story short…I did my best to stop recruiting or accepting friends that could potentially get me beat-up for their actions…until this one instance…I won’t discuss it, it was just crazy that as I mature, I keep having to learn this lesson with new people…

But anyway… I will tell of the story behind the title before I close!!!

So, I had a roommate (in college)…I won’t say which year but she often had guests over that were interesting in different sorts…and some of the guests…I did reject their sleepover requests…

But one in particular (oh yes!)…I’m pretty sure was a stranger (although she attempted other strangers in our dorm room)…this one was female and friendly plus our other roommate was there as well (for extra eyes on our things)… and made us not so alarmed by her presence as with the strange men.

However, let’s get specific…

Homegirl needed deodorant on a serious level…the funk filled our room (which was not small) with her funk for several hours even after she left!!!!

The other roommate and I cried laughing after the 2 of them left…because of how long and how much Febreeze we needed to change the situation…

Therefore, Funky guests make your whole house funky, as do funky attitudes.

Let me say this…and I’m done…yep GYC Rant Style

When we grow-up, mature, think a lil’ more about our actions and consequences…we have no choice but to start giving time to the things that will grow us in our new thinking…aka…stop hanging around funky people if you ain’t funky no more!!! Also…funky is not just bad attitude…I’m including people with small thinking…if your thinking has become bigger and you finally have realized the endless possibilities of your abilities…STOP discussing this with people who have yet to realize their own…just inform them that they have a truth bigger than what they are living right now and they NEED to access IT!!! …It seriously is TIME UP for maintaining BAD relationships at the cost of your growth!!! If YOU, ME, WE don’t… our house will be FUNKY even after we clean up, bathe, brush our teeth, put on deodorant and all of that!!! STOP WELCOMING FUNKY GUESTS IN YOUR PERSONAL SPACE…

I know you’re thinking… “Girl YOU Crazy!!!!!!!!!!!! But she is telling the TRUTH!!!”

Listen…we are in this together…because Girl…YOU, ME, WE are going to the next level and funky guest are not welcome!!!

Last Notes in GYC Quotes

“If you want to attract new people with different attitudes…stop inviting the old ones with funky attitudes.”-Sounds like something your mother might say…it’s cool…some have called me Mama Lauren!!!

“If you offer someone with bad breath a mint and they won’t take it…walk away because they are not ready for change.”-The Truth (if you ever heard it!!!)

I’ll give you a minute to think on that…

“You are better than your past because you are still here in the present…so walk worthy in your position by being selective of who you give permission...to walk with you.”-Just GYC…no extra commentary

Join us next week on Thursday at 7pm EST for our Google+ Hangout for the What is Beauty? Campaign...where I will be speaking on "Purpose"...and celebrating GYC's 1 year anniversary on June 25th! Then on July 1st 8th, join us right here for Part 2 of the "When a Stranger Lingers..." If YOU missed the introduction, click here

When a Stranger Lingers: The Introduction | Let’s quote "The Godfather…"

Let’s quote The Godfather…

Or Sun-Tzu…whatever!!!!!!!

“Keep your friends close but your enemies closer”

Then place this quote in the T-R-A-S-H!!!

Please Note… if you use that phrase and give it out as advice…you ARE NOT GOING TO LIKE THIS POST but YOU just may need this series!!!!

Because Girl YOU Crazy to allow strangers to linger like friends who are eager about your forward progress with nothing to gain…

My enemies (and yours neither) do NOT need to be kept close, closer, or kept anywhere near me at all…NO DAY!!!!!

“Yea I said it!”

Whelp…seems like I dived right into that…so let me back up slowly…but surely speed up to approach this series, as my excitement WILL rise as I discuss this topic!

Okay? Okay.

Welcome to the "When a Stranger Lingers" Series

(I have yet to think of a graphic for the series...this life is a process...we shall see what I come up with!)

I feel like this series/post has been a long time coming since the “Girl YOU Crazy” face is usually given and influential by those who have some kind of influence in our lives…and knowing if that influence is helpful or handicapping to our progress!

In thinking about this…

The overly used phrase…and made oh so popular by The Godfather, “Keep your friends close but your enemies closer” came to mind.

And what better way to open up a series on the people you keep around you... than with that silliness!? I mean really???

Girl…

So let’s get into it!

How often do we maintain “friendships” or “acquaintances” with people WE have allowed to hold us back, and/or mar/diminish/destroy our self-worth because he/she’s opinion has more weight in our life than the truth?

Take a moment…

Maintaining friendly contact with an enemy because we think we will get ahead or gain something by association…

Or maybe YOU call it "not burning your bridges"…

GYC Side Note/Quick Rant… This is not about business but about people you allow to be part of your personal life…YES, I do know that YOU have enemies you may have to work with or need to help you complete a professional task. This is different; there are boundaries!!! And just in case you’re wondering how I know this at 23… I’ve had my eyes open for a long time and since I was a kid, I had others attempt to compete with me and call me friend…Even then…I knew you don’t compete with friends…and as I matured, I realized you don’t compete with ANYONE (What is for me is for me!)…Because it has no end…it’s pointless!!!

If we knowingly keep people around us that do not wish us well, won’t tell us the truth, help us grow, or cheer us on…how can we habitually live successful, walk in our definition and be courageous?

When we know who we are…we need to remember there ARE people equipped to handle who we are even through struggle…and be our support without hidden intentions or sabotaging motives.

Join us to see what journey the entire series has in store as GYC approaches its 1-year anniversary June 25th!!!

As we uncover the GYC-ness of friendships or the people we keep around us…Remember:

“When YOU want to succeed…Surround yourself with people that want YOU to succeed!”-GYCGirlYOUCrazy

My habits are a habit

“My habits make a habit of sparking my inner passion. We all have a Secrets Whisperer living within…some pay attention while others wonder why didn’t they listen.”-The habitual thought provoker

My habits are a habit that I habitually practice...so no longer will I wonder why this or that happened…I'll find it in my habits that I habitually practice!

Habits are our life’s story.

GYC this maybe possibly annoying WARNING… the word HABIT, WILL be used A LOT/several/muy mucho/Girl can you think of another word…times…just so you know!

…Let us continue,

When we think about habits and the process of our life…we either say/yell ‘we don’t care’…or begin to think on whether or not our habits are good or bad, and what actually makes them good or bad…then the big question,

 WHO has the right to say which is so?????

This post is for the ones willing to think on their habits…the “I don’t cares”…not so much…”Girl WE are in Operation Live it don’t Wish it!!!” <<<Click to tweet!

In thinking on this,

I thought about how I relate business to people and people to business…and understanding the use for observation and the study of people’s habits that are exploited for profitable increase (just stating the facts here… it is what it is!!!)…

BUT

What if YOU paid attention like all successful businesses do,

for increase in your own life????

If we know and acknowledge our habits as habits…then we have the opportunity to change the positioning of our thinking when it goes against our progress and purpose.

So, I decided that I would look, think on and observe my habits…then personally decide if they were good or bad habits…for increase in my life. And for the purpose of this post, and increasing together…I will share a few exploited habits in the form of strength by pushing back on habits that may be holding ANY of us back!

And the story/GYC Life Grocery & Check List (with notes) of the exploited habits unfolds…

My habits are a habit… so I train and exploit them in pursuit of my purpose.

+ Everyday we have the opportunity to increase, take a step further, move forward, progress…not stand still in our thinking, trust and go from whatever perspective we may have but if we ignore it…and continue to ignore it…

+How will we define and pursue our purpose?

+How will we be able to identify distractions, if we decide to live distracted?

Since our habits are habits…train and exploit them as such/so/as they are…finding yourself in the position to only be distracted by living a life full of your purpose, which is no distraction at all!

Exploiting your habits for the good and sanity of pursuing your own dreams…and the purpose of remaining focused.

+ Train/make yourself drive/walk pass the materials of your dreams.

+ Train/make yourself talk about your dreams with people who care, and are willing to give you advice on how to get there…even if all they say is…REMAIN!

+ Train/make yourself use words of faith, encouragement, inspiration, love and joy…then as the old slewfoots approach, YOU (ME, WE) will find ourselves unmoved and still focused after its air time is over!!!...

HELLO Somebody!!!!

It’s learning to fight…to remain until you see the victory in your reality…a habit of increase.

My habits are a habit…so I make it a habit to finish, even if MY completion looks different then how you see it (OUR perspective belongs to us…whether we choose to explain it to another…or NOT)!

+ Thinking about this habit…I thought about how I love to have the last word when arguing, and even more when I realize the other person is pursuing/attempting/TRYING to get the last word…unnecessarily…Girl YOU Must Be Crazy!!!

But in that…there is some type/form/manner…of completion I’m seeking, so much that I’ll even create a way (other than just letting it go…) that declares I FINISHED THIS!

+Although wanting the last word is so small…it gave Me (personally) a visual of what it looks like to finish willingly.

++Demonstrating you must train yourself to making it a habit to finish even if that means discontinuing…giving yourself room to move on and forward!!!

My habits are a habit… so I continuously refuse to quit anything attached to my purpose!

+ Refuse to quit.

+ Refuse to quit.

+ You may need to take a break/pause/look in the mirror and breathe…

BUT ALWAYS…

+++REFUSE TO QUIT any and ALL THINGS Attached to YOUR PURPOSE because it is JUST THAT IMPORTANT!!!!!!!!!!!!!++ <<< Click to tweet!

Nothing is worth losing or neglecting a dream of purpose

…just because it gets hard.

Click to tweet!

Habitually walk in trust and not in fear.

Personal but Quick GYC Story:

You gotta/haffta (have to) stop saying yes to habits that don’t profit you, move you forward, and lead you to open doors.

I’ll tell you like a friend told me, when he attempted to convince me…to introduce him to a female friend of mine…although I didn’t, what he said when I responded “that will never work out”...most certainly stuck with me…

”YOU are NOT a psychic Lauren!!!”

I’m pretty sure, it is too many times…so I prefer not to add up the number of times I attempted to foresee something I knew I should do BUT DID NOT… because of what I THOUGHT would happen, and honestly, in the moments that I recall…the only way for me to know what was going to happen…was for it to actually happen.

So, I refuse to walk away from moments that are supposed to happen in my life because of the FunKy habit of…

Predicting my future…

versus walking in trust and not in fear.

GYC Side NOTE:

It was a habit that kept me from living with hope…you know the whole doubting before you get there, everyone is against me, always keep your guard up, it’s only going to happen if it happens this or that way…all of that craziness that keeps YOU, ME, WE from trying, attempting, pursuing…LIVING!

My habits are a habit… so if I continue to stay for the drama, I’ll train myself to always be distracted by foolishness…

+ This sort of speaks for itself…HELLO!!! But I remember a time in my life…although not that long ago…when it would excite me to hear of a fight going on at school (grade school)… I just had to see it!!! Then I matured a little and started to listen to the pre-fight conversation… AND realized how SILLY/CRAZY it was to want to see a fight when MY LIFE could be in danger!!!!

---Girl I traded in that crazy!!!

+ I had to train myself to not want to see it (plus there are many fights on TV…just saying) by reminding myself that I COULD BE IN DANGER!!!

+ The more you think about the drama you’re in or attempting to be in…you realize how it’s not pushing you forward and how far it will push you back.

Drama is inevitable but your participation is ALWAYS an option.

Click to tweet!

Because I noticed people would remain friends with those not really considered a friend…I made it a habit to stop collecting dead weight, and really think about who is on my team and am I on theirs (Plant Where YOU Prosper)!

+ Someone once told me that I like a lot of people around me…and that it was unnecessary…and would not benefit/help/increase me. But not until I got older, did I decide to observe and fully process what this person meant…

+ There is no need to keep people around as so-called friends that YOU do not voluntarily want to embrace and celebrate…

Tell me if I’m wrong?!

+++Or people who only see you as a way in or “meal-ticket”…take time to observe… they will show themselves! This is friendship…not networking!!!

Friends pour into each other’s lives without the hidden intention of some sort of gain.
Click to tweet!

My habits are a habit…so daily I decide to accept who I am without comparison, unapologetically and walking in my freedom and beliefs unashamedly.

+ Open your eyes everyday to learn more and more about WHO YOU ARE without the consideration of negative bystanders, or opinions that have Not-A-Thing to do with YOU.

+ Know your definition; Read it and Live it daily!

+ To know and accept WHO you are, ATTACHED to your purpose is a powerful walk.

+ Each day GIVE yourself a mirror-check!

+ In moments of stress and pressure…force yourself to take a deep breath and actually look in the mirror to remember regardless of the situation...You are still here!

+Train yourself to accept yourself with no shame, acknowledging that YOU DO Have Purpose and your boldness to pursue it…is beautiful!

May your steps on your path habitually lead to the reality of your dreams!